The long term trauma and mental health as I have suffered from being the golden child at the age sixteen years old even before that I was dealing with situation that was more serious. I suffer from depression, suicidal thoughts where I ended up in the institution hospital being supervised for trying to kill myself three times before, also I suffered from PTSD from all that trauma that I went through with my mother and my grandmother for all these years I was being lied to by this person who was only using me for source of supply. I defended this person in public when everybody didn’t like her or hearing the things she was doing behind the scene I was blind by her love and that was my mistake as a man because you can’t help who you love. I disrespected myself so much to the point where it was more genuine on my side than it was on her. In the end she hurt me she hurt everybody els around her because she selfish I don’t deserve that nobody does.